A father has to pay ‘alimony’ to his children from two wives, complains he can’t afford all these expenses


Parenting has always caused and will cause much controversy and discussion – from how to properly tie a diaper to whether adult children should even take care of their parents if they have paid little attention to them in their childhood.

The question of parenthood is especially painful if the parents are divorced, and if the new family has children from the next marriage, the situation becomes even more confusing. For example, with respect to family finances, if spouses lead a split household.

A similar situation developed in the family of the author of this post in the AITA Reddit community, user u/Life_Grade_4261. The post we are talking about has now received around 12.2,000 upvotes and almost 5.4,000 different comments in just a few days. The opinions of commentators are divided, like the finances of the spouses, but most condemn the man all the same. However, let’s talk about everything in detail.

More info: Reddit

The author of the message has two children with his current wife and three children from his first marriage

Image credits: Chris Price (not the actual image)

Thus, the author of the message has three children from his first marriage with “Hannah” and two from his second wife, “Stacey”. By the very admission of the original poster, when he and Stacey got married, the woman specifically stipulated that Hannah’s children were the sole responsibility of their parents. For almost five years of marriage, this caused no problems for the OP, but the time came, and then the problems arose…

Image credits: u/Life_Grade_4261

Man pays alimony to ex-wife and split finances with new wife

According to the man, he pays Hannah child support for each of their children, and when Stacy was pregnant with their first baby, she demanded that he pay her a similar amount to make it fair. The man reveals that he also pays for half of his common expenses with Stacey (mortgage, utilities, food, etc.) as well as for his own car, while his wife takes care of most of the expenses of their two children.

Image credits: u/Life_Grade_4261

The OP admits that it hasn’t been a problem for Stacey to take care of her children since her first marriage – for example, she happily picks them up from school, takes them to various activities and makes sure they have everything they need. Financially, however, the wife regularly makes requests of her husband to Venmo, demanding that he pay for the expenses of children who are “not his own”.

Image credits: u/Life_Grade_4261

The wife covers the needs of her children and the husband usually pays for his children from the first marriage

For example, when the extended family recently went on a family vacation, Stacey asked her husband to pay half of the expenses for their children and pay in full for Hannah’s children. The man admits his wife earns more than him, so this alignment has hit his finances hard, but Stacy once again stressed that her children are her own responsibility.

Image credits: Blondinrikard Froberg (not the actual image)

And more recently, Stacy started saving money for a college fund for her kids. Hannah, learning of this, suggested that her ex-husband start raising money for their children as well. When the man told Stacey about it, she approved of the idea, but noted that then the OP should have contributed the same amount to their two children’s college fund.

Image credits: u/Life_Grade_4261

When the man was faced with having to contribute to a university fund for his 5 children, he felt rather uneasy

Needless to say, when the man calculated all of his upcoming expenses, he became very discouraged, then suggested that Stacy pay a “fair share” of her household expenses. The OP explained this by saying that his current wife makes more money than him so for her it won’t be a financial hardship, while he will be almost on the verge of bankruptcy literally paying for whatever lies ahead of him .

Image credits: u/Life_Grade_4261

The man asked his current wife to share his household expenses since she earns more than him, but the wife scolded him

Stacy, however, took her husband’s idea extremely negatively. She literally exploded, took the children and left with them to her parents. The OP admits his wife has been refusing to talk to him for a day and a half, and now he’s wondering if he did the right thing, and was it even worth coming up with that particular idea?

Image credits: Monochrome (not the actual image)

Most people in the comments shared the wife’s outrage at the idea of ​​the husband

It must be said that many reviewers were initially generally confused by the family and financial relationships of the original poster, not understanding who is paying what and whose parents are whose. However, most people in the comments supported Stacy’s outrage at her husband’s offer.

According to commentators, the woman pays half of the household expenses, takes care of all the needs of her two children and also takes care of three children who are not her own. Yes, the PO pays for their needs, but picking up the kids from school, taking them to activities, and running errands for them takes a lot of time and energy. Therefore, as people believe, the OP is fundamentally wrong, and in any case, he is fully responsible for all children born to him.

However, there are situations when even the original poster looks like a completely decent person. For example, this father once took his new family to Paris, and not only did not invite his teenage daughter from the first marriage, but kept the secret to herself. Anyway, we are already looking forward to your comments on the story we have just described.


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